Sunday, September 24, 2006
Sometimes when I write I want to capture the moment. I've kept a journal for about 5 years now, and recorded my journeys across the USA and some of my earliest moments of walking in the Spirit.
This morning it's about 9 a.m. my time. I've been awake for almost 3 hours today, with such anticipation that today is the day of worship, the day of the Lord, and I'm going to go into His courts and worship Him and declare His praise across the continent of Africa. His goodness is wonderful to me, the further I go the further I find how little I deserve to be a partner of God.
I saw these "gold bricks" in prayer, even heard that word shortly in my spirit...when I say "saw" I'm not carried away into the 3rd heaven, but simply walking in what is available to any believer with the mind of Christ in him or her, we can think like Him...you see, before I enter the temple today, I entered the house. Today I awoke with 2 of my African brothers who stayed the night (hey WP-God nights!) and last night we went into the throne of our gracious God...they actually kindled the fire this morning, as I began to awake they figured out how to play a Hillsong CD of mine, and put it to "You Said...ask for the nations..." we began our day in the Holy Spirit, we laid a foundation of gold...and it was reflective to me of all that our Father wants to do---in 1st Cor. there is a passage starting in 3:10 about how Paul said every work of every minister and believer will be tested, and if it is of "hay or straw" which is the natural ability of men, the natural resources of men, the material of men; those things will be consumed in fire...but if it is "of gold & treasure", if it is of the heavenly ability of God, dependence upon Him alone, the treasures of His Spirit, then that work will last and won't be consumed in the fire He sends.
I still cannot give you a "big" report, I can say this: soon, I'll be traveling to several countries. I've made contacts with several missionaries and have received invitations to assist them in media related needs, while they have also spoken to me of opportunities to preach in their churches and assist in their evangelism and outreach into the bush. Nate says this: "let's go!" and yet the Lord has said, "wait, wait, wait upon ME!" and so I have had to yield to Him...so much of me has been drained, exasperated, exhausted and depleted...some of that is the purifying touch of death that comes in the sharing of crucifixion with victorious Jesus; and some of that has come through my repentance of mistakes I've made, through His cleansing of my not so pure desires, my ignorant lusts, my selfish ambitions...He has rescued me from false romances I would have pursued with women He did not call me to be with, He has forgiven my desire to be joined to something other than Him...and in it all, I find that my foundation has stood, that He has stood, not because of me but because He Himself is the pure gold of our foundation, He Himself is the purest reward to run for and work for; my goal in ministry is to connect the lost to intimacy in Him...I refuse to lay one material brick on top of another and call it ministry, I want to only build what man cannot see and yet will be the only thing seen forever.
Here is exactly how I feel: "I don't mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ Jesus saved me for and wants me to be. No, dear brothers and sisters, I am not all I should be, but I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us up to heaven." -Phillippians 3:12-14
Glory to our most deserving and worthy King of all Kings, the Friend of Sinners, the Lover of His Bride; with all my thanks He still keeps me,
in Him
Nate
This morning it's about 9 a.m. my time. I've been awake for almost 3 hours today, with such anticipation that today is the day of worship, the day of the Lord, and I'm going to go into His courts and worship Him and declare His praise across the continent of Africa. His goodness is wonderful to me, the further I go the further I find how little I deserve to be a partner of God.
I saw these "gold bricks" in prayer, even heard that word shortly in my spirit...when I say "saw" I'm not carried away into the 3rd heaven, but simply walking in what is available to any believer with the mind of Christ in him or her, we can think like Him...you see, before I enter the temple today, I entered the house. Today I awoke with 2 of my African brothers who stayed the night (hey WP-God nights!) and last night we went into the throne of our gracious God...they actually kindled the fire this morning, as I began to awake they figured out how to play a Hillsong CD of mine, and put it to "You Said...ask for the nations..." we began our day in the Holy Spirit, we laid a foundation of gold...and it was reflective to me of all that our Father wants to do---in 1st Cor. there is a passage starting in 3:10 about how Paul said every work of every minister and believer will be tested, and if it is of "hay or straw" which is the natural ability of men, the natural resources of men, the material of men; those things will be consumed in fire...but if it is "of gold & treasure", if it is of the heavenly ability of God, dependence upon Him alone, the treasures of His Spirit, then that work will last and won't be consumed in the fire He sends.
I still cannot give you a "big" report, I can say this: soon, I'll be traveling to several countries. I've made contacts with several missionaries and have received invitations to assist them in media related needs, while they have also spoken to me of opportunities to preach in their churches and assist in their evangelism and outreach into the bush. Nate says this: "let's go!" and yet the Lord has said, "wait, wait, wait upon ME!" and so I have had to yield to Him...so much of me has been drained, exasperated, exhausted and depleted...some of that is the purifying touch of death that comes in the sharing of crucifixion with victorious Jesus; and some of that has come through my repentance of mistakes I've made, through His cleansing of my not so pure desires, my ignorant lusts, my selfish ambitions...He has rescued me from false romances I would have pursued with women He did not call me to be with, He has forgiven my desire to be joined to something other than Him...and in it all, I find that my foundation has stood, that He has stood, not because of me but because He Himself is the pure gold of our foundation, He Himself is the purest reward to run for and work for; my goal in ministry is to connect the lost to intimacy in Him...I refuse to lay one material brick on top of another and call it ministry, I want to only build what man cannot see and yet will be the only thing seen forever.
Here is exactly how I feel: "I don't mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ Jesus saved me for and wants me to be. No, dear brothers and sisters, I am not all I should be, but I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us up to heaven." -Phillippians 3:12-14
Glory to our most deserving and worthy King of all Kings, the Friend of Sinners, the Lover of His Bride; with all my thanks He still keeps me,
in Him
Nate
# posted by Nate Sanow @ 9:10 AM 
