find the forgotten

blog has moved
please go to
www.watchthenations.blogspot.com
or via the site at
www.watchthenations.com

thanks!

p.s. FTF isn't gone! The heart behind it is just as intact as ever.

2 months. At least 16 days of driving; 4 to get there, 5 to get back, plus all sorts of driving within and up to Tanzania. 8 days of laying in bed with sickness. 7 days with most the day spent with hassle from government and vehicle maintenance. So, that means one month of ministry, one month stuff. For both months, carrying a bucket of water from a well to wash yourself, and using that same bucket for your laundry. Steady diet of rice and beans, joining in with the Africans and what they eat. Regular cans of sardines and tuna-fish, and lot's of boiled eggs and raisins make good travel food. Corrupt police time and time again. Nearly being attacked by 3 men who were sneaking up on me when I was alone one night, only to quickly drive off. Broken down in the bush. Flat tire, and a flat spare, thank God near the city and a walk into town to borrow a spare saves us. Broken windows in the truck thanks to narrow roads and trees that never know the word trim. Wondering what the noise "tink, tink, tink" is until the rear-wheel drive shaft falls off...leading to the use of 4 wheel drive to get back to South Africa, meaning actually turning on the 4 wheel drive gave us simply the front 2 wheels....and THEN...being hosted in homes with my African family...experiencing their pure love...watching villages readily come to Jesus....Muslims changing their path...preaching in new frontiers...possibly being the first white man kids have ever seen, and laughing that my looks scare people...teaching hundreds and hundreds of pastors and other believers...making disciples...loving orphans...watching the Kingdom come to the earth, and advance, and learning what I need to unlearn in order to allow more...


AND THEN...

Going into one of the dozens of villages we saw...outreach...holding kids in my arms--happy to hold kids. Watching an amazed crowd form around me, only until a man with one blind eye comes to me. I just learned the word for eye in his Makua-tribe tongue that day as I sat with kids and pointed at things while they taught me, so I knew somehow what he was asking me. I just went into His presence, yes, moving my mouth and putting my hands on his eye...but, I was simply waiting upon the Lord...and, I even forgot for a second that it was about even this blind man and what these people would think; I just sat and thought about how good Jesus is, and looked at Him until I knew He was there, and then took my hand off this man's eye to find that both his eyes are now normal! Laughing and dancing with this crowd as we thank the Lord, "Koopi, Koopi, Koopi!!!" (Praise, Praise, Praise!) and me and my brothers and sisters cheer unto the Lord...I walk away knowing that my methods and plans really don't matter, and that Jesus is a lovely interruption into any ministry schedule; the stuff HE does is really cool.

AND NOW....

I finish a plate of chicken-wings and wash it down with an ice cold coke at my favorite pizzeria in South Africa, where they give you free wireless internet if you buy somthing...so, a $2.50 plate of chicken with fries and a coke gives me a chance to get online and not worry about time, and catch up on dozens of emails and try to keep you all posted as best I can...I feel truly clean after a hot shower...I feel well rested after having a real bed to sleep on...suddenly SA might as well be America for me...yet having these things or enjoying rest is almost unfulfilling as I reflect on a life spent in tents, African homes, (you might call them shacks, but I don't call them that anymore now that I sleep in them they look like home, too) a mission base, and wherever we find ourselves that day...and, all to quickly I dream of the next place to go, the need for fathering and discipleship that these young believers now have and a desire already to return to both Namibia and Mozambique and check up on friends...

Yet now for various reasons there will be significant changes coming for me soon. The details aren't exact yet, but more will be posted later. Suffice it to say, even when "at home" (and that's the odd thing, coming back to SA is coming home) I'm really aware right now that "the shelter of the Most High" is really truly the place I want to live. So, your prayers are needed, and my thanks are yours as you've helped me get here and are my partners in the Lord. Let's not stop. Let's continue. Someone is still waiting to hear.

love
Nate

"Do not be weary in well doing, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6.9

Why would such a verse exist? Likely, because doing good things can be hard work and has the possibility to wear us out. Why else would it exist? Because in all the trimming and carving to be done on the inside of us, the possibility of harvest reaping is ahead and even now it is here.

I've now seen with my own eyes a small girl exclaim "momma, papa, Jesus!!!" for the first time in her life---born deaf only to hear and speak what she heard. I wasn't the one God used to do the miracle, I was a bystander watching Heidi Baker be used of the Lord...Yet, I pray that even if I were to have been the one He chose, that I would still just treat it as though I was watching the Lord. Anyway, I've read her books, I've admired her ministry from afar and yet now to watch the creation of tomorrow's history take place before me...wow...I'm a bit at a loss for what to say...

The Lord in His grace allowed me to preach in another village that had never had a gospel witness, ever. It was Muslim and had rejected the gospel messenger's prior to our arrival--with rocks thrown. Yet Jesus gave me about a full day to set aside time for prayer and to seek His heart for those people. The night before I went out for a drive into the bush and sat in my truck about a few kilometers near the village. I just sat and spoke liberty and freedom over the people...I was content the next night to just go and watch the Kingdom advance and to simply hold kids in my arms and pray while it all happened...Then, from amongst a crowd of hundreds, Heidi called me forward and asked me to preach before she was even half done. Something in my soul wanted to cry, not because I was sad or afraid but just because I don't deserve stuff like this. I read the other day about the invitation Jesus gave Simon to fish for the hearts of men. When the Lord miraculously provided a huge catch of literal fish to symbolize the emerging ministry of Simon Peter and the Pentecost 3 years later, this human vessel said to Jesus, "get away from me Lord, for I am a sinful man." I know what he meant. He didn't really want Jesus to get away, it was just that the prospect of Him doing such great things through him overwhelmed him with something he couldn't fully grasp or feel like he deserved. Sometimes I tell the Lord that type of thing, too, and then HE exclaims, "Nate, PREACH! I'm with you, right? Go, preach!" And, so, at the invitation of Jesus inside His daughter Heidi, I proclaimed the Word of God, though translation was needed and though there is much needed discipleship ahead, the Lord used it as only HE can. The prayer time after my message was marvelous, and these formerly forgotten people were found in the love of Jesus Christ. Children were up at the front...yet I'm finding the idea of "altar calls" is almost silly in these village, for when HE falls on us the entire village becomes an altar-a place to meet God. Dozens desired prayer for healing, and healing came. I laid hands on a man's back only to feel such warmth come from my heart and then into my hands and then into his back, and the smile on the man's face told me he was healed and felt better. Praise God!!!

So after over a month of no running water, constant harrasment from corrupt police officers, several truck problems (in the remote area's I may add) I'm refreshed in God and am no longer wanting to remain weary, for a moment, in His harvest field. It's a new year, not just on the calender but in the heavenly realms it's a new season with His stuff getting poured out on anyone who says "Yes!" Let's say yes and allow Him to bring His harvest about. It's happening, the Kingdom is coming, and on the other side of the Jordan nothing we leave behind us will be regretted. Let's go!

in Him
Nate

"Do not be weary in well doing, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6.9

Why would such a verse exist? Likely, because doing good things can be hard work and has the possibility to wear us out. Why else would it exist? Because in all the trimming and carving to be done on the inside of us, the possibility of harvest reaping is ahead and even now it is here.

I've now seen with my own eyes a small girl exclaim "momma, papa, Jesus!!!" for the first time in her life---born deaf only to hear and speak what she heard. I wasn't the one God used to do the miracle, I was a bystander watching Heidi Baker be used of the Lord...Yet, I pray that even if I were to have been the one He chose, that I would still just treat it as though I was watching the Lord. Anyway, I've read her books, I've admired her ministry from afar and yet now to watch the creation of tomorrow's history take place before me...wow...I'm a bit at a loss for what to say...

The Lord in His grace allowed me to preach in another village that had never had a gospel witness, ever. It was Muslim and had rejected the gospel messenger's prior to our arrival--with rocks thrown. Yet Jesus gave me about a full day to set aside time for prayer and to seek His heart for those people. The night before I went out for a drive into the bush and sat in my truck about a few kilometers near the village. I just sat and spoke liberty and freedom over the people...I was content the next night to just go and watch the Kingdom advance and to simply hold kids in my arms and pray while it all happened...Then, from amongst a crowd of hundreds, Heidi called me forward and asked me to preach before she was even half done. Something in my soul wanted to cry, not because I was sad or afraid but just because I don't deserve stuff like this. I read the other day about the invitation Jesus gave Simon to fish for the hearts of men. When the Lord miraculously provided a huge catch of literal fish to symbolize the emerging ministry of Simon Peter and the Pentecost 3 years later, this human vessel said to Jesus, "get away from me Lord, for I am a sinful man." I know what he meant. He didn't really want Jesus to get away, it was just that the prospect of Him doing such great things through him overwhelmed him with something he couldn't fully grasp or feel like he deserved. Sometimes I tell the Lord that type of thing, too, and then HE exclaims, "Nate, PREACH! I'm with you, right? Go, preach!" And, so, at the invitation of Jesus inside His daughter Heidi, I proclaimed the Word of God, though translation was needed and though there is much needed discipleship ahead, the Lord used it as only HE can. The prayer time after my message was marvelous, and these formerly forgotten people were found in the love of Jesus Christ. Children were up at the front...yet I'm finding the idea of "altar calls" is almost silly in these village, for when HE falls on us the entire village becomes an altar-a place to meet God. Dozens desired prayer for healing, and healing came. I laid hands on a man's back only to feel such warmth come from my heart and then into my hands and then into his back, and the smile on the man's face told me he was healed and felt better. Praise God!!!

So after over a month of no running water, constant harrasment from corrupt police officers, several truck problems (in the remote area's I may add) I'm refreshed in God and am no longer wanting to remain weary, for a moment, in His harvest field. It's a new year, not just on the calender but in the heavenly realms it's a new season with His stuff getting poured out on anyone who says "Yes!" Let's say yes and allow Him to bring His harvest about. It's happening, the Kingdom is coming, and on the other side of the Jordan nothing we leave behind us will be regretted. Let's go!

in Him
Nate

I'm not a statue to be built
With more bricks added to me
I'm just a large piece of wood
That needs to be carved

So take away the outside
Take away the layers I show
Carve me on the inside
So it's You alone I know

I'd rather be sculpted
than to be a building
I'd rather allow You take away
than to hold on to today

Lord You know
I'm not what they see
Lord You know
The worry inside of me
But Lord You are
More patient than men
How do You put up with me?

So, Father, please carve me as you wish
Father please take my ugly layers
Let the old stuff die
Father I pray I might be little to You
Father I pray that You may be big to me

Please help this outside to go
May it be You alone I show
If it is true that Christ is in me
Than allow this little one that carries You
To be taken apart, broken down, exhausted in the smoke
And shine in this carving
With outside stuff now lost
Shine I pray in this carving
And perfect this small piece of me

So take away the outside
Take away the layers I show
Carve me on the inside
So it's You alone I know


This poem is written after a week of 2 flat tires, broken down truck in the bush 6 hours away from any city, 2 broken windows, stolen clothing, deceiving manipulators and thieves, being detained hours by the police with visa problems; and frankly at times I found that I still care too much about this life, I still actually for a moment believe that earth is my home and I find that I love the things even for a second at a time. I found myself exhausted from worry and stress, I found myself in a position where had God not delivered me so quickly I could have been stuck out in the bush for a few days. And why, why did that bother me? Why was I worried? The logical explanation is that my truck is worth a lot of money. LOVE!!! Love for that possession I see!!! Oh God, let me not have a second of doubt, for I know Your hand is mighty to save!!! I've had to let go, and more so ask the Lord to help me let go. I've had a week where I feel like I lived 3 months of life. I tried to leave the country to refresh my 30 day visa, only to find at the border they wouldn't allow us back in. So, in "no man's land" where I wasn't exactly on the Tanzania side, not exactly on the Mozambique side, I wasn't able to get into either country---there was a river in front but no ferry...so after a boat ride and then a bike ride into Tanzania and paying $70 for those 2 rides that only lasted about 30 minutes (robbery! They made me pay 3 times what a national pays only because I'm white and they think I'm rich) I did allow myself to doubt the Lord and what He would do. Now, I see favor upon us and after a few phone calls I can stay in Mozambique, praise the Lord. Then once they did finally let us into Mozambique again, the altinator to the truck broke down, hours away from any city. Some village mechanics helped fix it for a decent rate, and I was able to witness to a man who knew English pretty well in the process. He begged me to stay in his city and teach the Word...you can imagine my pain in leaving (which I only did because if I stayed I'd be facing governmental problems at the moment).

After all this, the prayer just fell off my tongue, "I'm a wood carving." I began to pray, "Lord, don't build me anymore, Lord, take me down so that You can carve whatever You want." Now, I feel refreshed and a new reality faces me that I can let go of this life more and more and more than I yet know, and, as I do, He will carve all that He wants to make in me while I let go. Praise the Lord.

We were able to preach to many lately, and we have a few more weeks in this country now should God allow it. But, I'm not looking to gain anything else again. While looking to find those who are forgotten, I myself must forget all that is behind me and look ahead to the Lord and allow Him to change me along the way. So, what better than at this altar to give Him a prayer along the way? This entry is Yours my Lord, take it, have it, and if someone is reading smile upon them as we allow You to carve us while we do what we do for you. Amen.

I'm sitting in an airconditioned office in a 5 star hotel, having just sat near a sunny beach off the Indian Ocean while sipping a chocolate milk-shake and reading my Bible. No, I didn't check into this hotel, just wanted to get online, and sad to admit it costs about $10 per hour to use this computer but you are worth it. Across the street is where I've been staying, which is just a 5-6 minute walk but the walk seems like a trek across the earth. In stark contrast to the elite surroundings I currently see I pass by cripples, beggars, and orphan children who play in the trash for fun hoping to find a new toy.

Welcome to the emerging paradox of Africa. I loved the journals of David Livingston and the others that went through this land when it was untouched and raw untamed, but now in Africa of the 21st century lions don't walk around on the streets they are kept in game reserves, village people live in huts yet posses radio devices and can walk to a thatched roof shop and get a Coke (a warm Coke, but a Coke nonetheless) and I may add Coke is in more places than the Church is. Having a piece of technology and the occasional cold drink across the street has provided me a sense of being "back home" around the holidays, trying to stay in touch and enjoy the wonderfully natural beauty of Mozambique.

My eyes have seen now thousands of villages on the 4 day drive from South Africa to northern Mozambique. Potholes, gravel roads, and a cop who said I was speeding only to gain his pocket cash (thief!) made an interesting drive. I arrived weary and tired, having pulled over and sleeping in a tent wherever we found a patch of dirt. We did find a house along the way via a Mozambiquan friend I met in SA, and as he hosted me in his small home his mother said the night before God gave her a dream that a white man would come to her house. I quickly adopted her as another spiritual mother and asked her to always remember me in prayer knowing I need people who walk in the Spirit to pray for me. I was encouraged knowing that surely the Lord had a reason for me to be here.

The next few days of the week found me a bit disappointed as I wanted to attend a conference by Iris Ministries here, only to find the dates I was given were wrong and I had missed it. That's where the short walk to the beach became a daily occurrence, and have had hours of time freely given for prayer. Not even so much have I loved God as much as just sit and let Him love me. That has been wonderful beyond words. Slowly I just allow myself to see myself as He sees me, and just wait upon Him for all the things I need to hear and know from Him. My Jesus has spoken, though not always with English but with words of heart and emotion.

Then, suppressions, amidst a few days of no direction the door flew wide open to go into the bush for 3 days with Heidi Baker, a hero of mine. I was able to see villages transformed by the power of God, to see a deaf child hear and to see Africans in a largely muslim province pray through the night in adoration of the Son of God. I was able to preach and teach on Fatherly love to the hungry villagers where the gospel has only been planted for 10 years. I slept in a tent in a village, ate the food they cooked and became a theme park for dozens of little kids who touched my skin as though I was from another world. Throwing kids to the air, hugging everyone I could, trying to learn as many Portuguese greetings as I could made for a slow but steady immersion into the world of the African village. I was able to meet her and received a great impartation from the laying on of hands and prayer...Praise the Lord!!!

As of now, I'm still waiting on open doors. But I don't pass by all the chances along the way. That's why I can say Find the Forgotten isn't and likely won't be an organization; it's who I am. I can't say I ever want to build an orphanage, but I do want to build up orphans. Somehow I've been able to gather with Australians, the Engish and Irish, Dutch, Canadians and so many others who have left their lands to come here. Together there have been chances for so much one on one ministry and fellowship, to build up the saints for the work of harvest.

Pray for me, that I may go into more villages while here. Also, please pray as it crushes my heart to leave such regions...I wish so deeply for the Lord to plant me as an oak of righteousness in His riverbed on the stream He wants(psalm ch.1); which I believe is amongst the forgotten. Point blank truth is I feel like I need to begin to "pick" a group of people that someday I can settle, learn their language and bring the gospel where men have never heard the name of Jesus. Pray for me.

To start off, I really wondered if I was going to do this entry, or show these pictures. Then a few weeks ago, I bought 2 CD's from Jason Upton, "Jacob's Dream" and "Trusting the Angels." It was SUPER ironic to me that both those CD's had pictures really, really, really similar to these photo's I had already taken. So, I took it as a big flashing green light from Jesus, almost as if He might slap me silly if I didn't post this. So, here goes...

I had one of those moments a bit back. I was reading the book of Luke. It was one of those "go there" days, where the Father said to me that He had revelation for me in what I would read, so I went to Luke 13. If you're like me, you can read, and re-read the Bible time and time again and still find all sorts of new goodies in there. In this chapter, there are a couple of longer passages; but tucked in between is one verse that stands alone. In this verse, Jesus says that His Kingdom is like a seed that grows into a large tree...And then birds rest upon it. That's the most of what it says. Huh? I had to wonder. Why does so much of what our Lord say go for a good while, and then here is this short little verse sitting there like a piece of candy on a vegetable tray...I simply pondered for a bit (and may I add, I highly suggest not just reading the Bible but thinking about it, too; sounds heretical but I think I gain more from those heart moments of impartation than I do from head moments of knowledge.) So, I had to ask myself again, "who are the birds?" I mean, really, why did Jesus say birds rest upon the tree? I'm 99.9% sure that the tree symbolizes the Body based on how often we find that symbolism in other passages (take John 15 which I'll dive into in a minute). I'm thinking, "this thing was a plant that grew; Jesus doesn't need to grow, we do...so I'm not, uh, we're not birds, I think..."

And then the Spirit hit me, "Angels." Ohhh. Then it clicked. The Kingdom grows, the people of God extend out and are attached to the Vine Jesus Christ....but this is a Kingdom of both the believer and Angelic hosts. Now, I'm almost already weary of writing about Angels because I've had about 2,330,124 checks in my spirit about the "revelations" people claim about things, where they get free revelation and sell all 190 pages for just $19.99 but outside of their revelation they have little impact. So I'm really not wanting to be like those false teachers Paul spoke about that will claim to have revelation but not bear true fruit of the Spirit. But, doesn't it actually make sense? I mean, the verse at hand even says, "they will REST upon the branches" now personally I think it's safe to say that in our worship and praise, these Messengers of the Flame (Hebrews 1) come and join in...now, remember that in another story in the Gospels Jesus talked about seeds being planted, you know, the one with good ground and bad ground? He then said there were thorns that choked seeds...then, he talked about birds that would come and steal seed...there it is again, this bird thing...I'm being a bit liberal here, but I think those birds easily can symbolize fallen angels, the demons of Satan. So I think it's safely contextual to say that Luke 13's birds have something to do with being those that "rest upon the tree" or, dare I say, rest upon us---if we are in the Kingdom.



Now Jesus says in John 15 something pretty scary if we are honest. He says that if the branches upon the Vine do not produce fruit, they will be cut off. Notice a branch can be upon the tree, but not reproduce. Just because we are "saved" doesn't mean that we have any excuse for being unfruitful. He also says that many branches will be pruned, a nice term for getting cut down so that what re-grows will actually be fruitful. Ouch. I look at me first, and realize that I've had to go through so much pruning (anyone else out there?) so that what does grow in my life will be of the Kingdom and not just of personal gain or wealth or benefit. I really feel deep in between the valves of my heart that the greatest work needed in the Church today is not one of a need for growth but a need to get rid of things in the Body that do not please our Lord. (this is, actually, primarily about Jesus right?) Cancer can grow. Viruses and disease and moss can grow. Just because we get bigger doesn't mean that Jesus says that it's a ministry. If our size is large but we look more like mold than we look like His tree I think that is the kind of thing He wants cut off.

And, in picture number one with the bird, I could only manage to get one bird at a time on a single tree, even though dozens were out and about in my area. But I think the sad reality is that we'd be lucky to find an Angel wanting to be in our midst a lot of the time. And in picture number two, I daresay that is a visual image of the Church right now. A lot of branches are trying to hold onto the Vine but Jesus is wanting things that don't look like Him to be cut away from His Kingdom. Now I know that sounds a bit harsh, but we often mistaken Jesus for being upset with those poor lost people in the world, when actually Jesus got more upset about religion then sin. Jesus died for sin, yes, but religion killed Him. I don't think branches being cut off means that He's tossing unfruitful believers to the flame, because this isn't flesh and blood we war in. Jesus wants the bad, really bad teachings on T.V., the deceitful evangelists and pastors and the lazy Christians to be willing to let go of the dead branch and simply allow Him to grow in us.

I promise you, in this next age of the Spirit, watch door after door after door close upon unfruitful ministries. Watch a new confusion arise in many local bodies. Watch churches shrink in numbers and not be able to attract people to salvation. But don't think that means it's a stronghold of the devil or an attack from hell. Realize with me that Jesus Himself wants whatever does grow to be of Him at all costs, even the cost of numbers. And watch small, little places that seem cut down be the places where the Angels rest in our worship. Watch the Kingdom shrink for just a bit, at least in our C.E.O. terms of supply and demand evangelism; but watch with me as the Lord move in simple ways, in the one on one encounters, in the living room, and in trimmed groups of people that were willing to let go of the dead branch.